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This diary has been declared Nietzsche-keen!

Todays Thelemic Date:




Seel means to pluck or remove the eyes -- in particular when a hawk or falcon pecks the eyes out.

31 is the Gematriac value for the Hebrew words AL (meaning God) and LA (meaning Naught).

Thus 31 Seel can mean 'to pluck the eyes of God' or 'Returning the eyes (of Man)'.

"With my Hawk's head I peck at the eyes of Jesus as he hangs upon the cross." -- AL III:51

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B9 d- t- k !s u-- f++ i o x+ e+ l+ c- (Click to translate)
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I am Geek, Philosopher, Occultist and a single Father. I have four children.

I have been online since 1989. I adopted the name Nexist around 1990-91. I created my main website Xenda'ths (pronounced Zen-da-aths) in 1995. Jake Stratton Kent began referring to me as Frater Xenda'ths around 1996, and I liked it, so I adopted Nexist Xenda'ths as my online persona (the number of layers of meaning from each element and the combinations thereof make for quite a bit of fun). The username of this diary derives from one of the multitude of persona's I invented for myself, this one being the poet/artist/musician. I still hope to make some music soon, and pick up painting again (I have determined that most -- if not all of my poetry -- should not be permitted to see the light of day, trendy fangirls opinions from when I lived on the streets notwithstanding).

I have used the following names, that I recall, in public/online environments, with or without a Frater proceeding them:

• DAR=5
• Alyn
• Dysulius ip Therreni
• Nexist (& derivatives)
• Eli Lith
• 31Seel
• Gæryth
• 0+X
• Vividus Propter Deperire
  This is an interesting Latin phrase as it can be translated in two ways:
  1. Truly Alive through (utter) Love
  2. Truly Alive through total Destruction (of the self)
• Blaster Iliou
  Greek: Seed of the Sun
• I.Sh.
  Active: Yod Shin
• and my Birth Name

States I have visited:


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The Idea and only the Idea can be the true Fatherland for them. Not the fact that they are of the same nationality, that they speak the same language, and that they are of the same blood, but the fact that they belong to the same idea, should be the deciding factor that unites or divides them." -- Evola

"There is only one pleasure greater than that of being appreciated by intelligent people, and that is the pleasure of not being understood by blunder-heads, who are only capable of expressing in a kind of jargon what serves them in the place of thought." - Georges Sorel

"And on the rulers turned I my back, when I saw what they now call ruling: to traffic and bargain for power--with the rabble!" - Nietzsche

"The characteristic fact of the moment is that the mediocre soul, recognizing itself as mediocre, has the audacity to assert the right of medocrity and impose it everywhere." - Jose Oretega y Gasset

"The genuine coherence of our ideas does not come from the reasoning that ties them together, but from the spiritual impulse that gives rise to them."
- Nicolás Gómez Dávila

"'Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.'
(In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags.)"
-- Thank you circe_magnifica

Still I was discouraged, a tired warrior,
But then, in that night in my nest, I was listening to music,
Took a certain song, powerful and dark - music like medicine,
Encouraged, cheered on by the sound, my power returned - Music like ammunition.
-- Gerhard Petak (thank you to Keith418 for pointing this out)